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Am I Ever Going To Get Myself Out Of This Mess?
I left the counseling office and headed back to class with the image of Mrs. Wilson’s lavender panties illuminating my mind. Not just any lavender panties, but Mrs. Wilson’s lavender panties. I kept thinking about her and all that had happened while I was in her company last period. I saw her sweet ass as she bent down toward the girl sitting on the bench. I felt her breasts rubbing across my chest when she turned around to greet me, but didn’t realize how close I was standing behind her, She flashed her lavender panties while talking to me and even dropped a pencil where I got a clearer view of her pussy, and then she asked me what was my favorite color. I told her lavender. And with a shy smile she told me it was her favorite color too. If she wasn’t so much older than me and if she wasn’t married I would think she was flirting with me and had some sexual interest in me.
But that seemed impossible because she was married to Mr. Wilson, even though anyone with a brain would know that was a terrible mismatch. I found myself wanting to be in Mrs. Wilson company more and more and I was really glad I had agreed to her offer to help me sort out my feelings once or twice a week in her counseling office.
The final bell rang and students headed toward their lockers and some went to after school tutorial, others to sport related activities, and still others got on buses to be taken home. I put all my books in my locker and headed toward Jennifer’s house. I thought about Mrs. Wilson’s warning me to be careful. I certainly didn’t want anyone to know I was going to be alone with Jennifer in her house, especially Matt. I didn’t know Matt very well and he always seemed to be upset and have a mean looking face. I couldn’t really understand what Jennifer saw in him, but she sure did open her legs wide and invited him to do whatever he wanted at Jill’s house even though she was drunk. That really pissed me off. She was going with me and while I was vacationing with my dad, she’s fucking the star football player in front of her classmates. How could she do such a stupid thing?
I was almost there. I decided to cut through one of her neighbor’s yard and go directly to her house. I kept looking to see if any students might be going by on their way home from sschool. I didn’t see anyone so I climbed the three steps leading to the deck and when I reached to knock on the door it came open and I went into her parent’s house.
We looked at one another. We didn’t say anything. We just looked at each other and then I saw tears flowing from her eyes down onto her cheeks. She didn’t try to rub them away. I felt empathy for her. Why? I don’t know. She started to say something but it didn’t register because she was crying while she was trying to speak to me. Then, she said, “Billy, I’m so sorry. I really am. I loved you! I wanted you so much and when we were together I felt loved and safe. fethiye escort I was depressed when you were with your dad on that camping trip. I was going nuts. I needed to be loved. I needed to be wanted. I felt abandoned, I felt alone. I didn’t go to that party to get drunk and act like a harlot, but some of the boys brought whiskey, beer, and wine and they offered me drinks. I lost all sense of decency. I danced and they cheered so I began to entertain them. Betty said I lifted my sweater and showed them my breasts. They hollered and shouted. I removed my bra. I threw it toward them.
“I lifted my skirt and danced around like a stupid woman and showing them my panties. I took them off and Betty said I twirled them over my head and threw them to Matt. He caught them and started sucking on them. I went to him and took his hand and led him down Jill’s hallway to a bedroom. I wanted him to fuck me Billy. Betty said I threw myself on the bed, pulled my skirt above my boobs, and spread my leg apart, and invited him to fuck me. How could I have done that! I didn’t realize how fucked up I was. I’m so ashamed. I violated you and embarrassed you and all my friends too. And then Matt wanted me to go steady with him. I knew everyone would tell you what happened and that you would be disgusted with my behavior and not want me anymore. I’m damaged goods, no one would want to date me, so I accepted Matt’s invitation to be his girl.
“I cried for weeks Billy, because of my stupidly and losing you. You’re the only guy that ever treated me with respect, the only guy I enjoyed making love to, the only guy who seemed to enjoy my company, and I threw it all away because of my carnal behavior from drinking. I ask you Billy to forgive me. I know you are dating another girl who I heard was studying at the community college and they tell me you are happy being with her. I’m not pleading for you to love me again. I just want your forgiveness. I want to be your friend. I need your wisdom, your advice, your consul, your friendship. I don’t love Matt, but he protected me from verbal abuse because people know that he has a temper and a mean spirit so they never said any disgusting words to me; but I’m not included in anyone’s social network anymore. I see Matt flirting with other girls now and I expect that he will decide it’s time to trade me in for another pony to ride.” Then she stopped talking and looked down at the floor.
“I feel sorry for you Jennifer. I was pissed when I found out about that evening at Jill’s house. I was depressed for weeks. First because my father was deployed overseas on a special mission and I was fearful for his well-being and I was depressed that I had loss you to another and wouldn’t enjoy your company or your love anymore. And my mom was depressed because her husband was going to be involved in a dangerous undertaking for over a year.
“Then I met Ginny. She was enthusiastic, beautiful in mind and body, fun to escort fethiye be with, a good dancer and she turned my world upside down. We seem to be well suited for one another, although she’s older than I. I might not have been able to forgive you before I met Ginny, but I can honestly tell you I can now. I forgive you Jennifer for having sex with Matt while we were a couple. I’m sorry you had to go through all that. I hope you know now that you shouldn’t drink at social events and when you drink, only have one. I don’t want you to have to go through this again.”
“Thank you Billy, thank you for listening to me this afternoon and not judging or interrupting me as I shared my disgusting behavior with you. Billy, I want to remain friends with you. I want to be able to talk freely with you as we’ve done in the pass. I loved how we could discuss all sorts of things. You make me feel good about myself, and I need that more now than ever. Thanks for coming and thanks for your forgiveness.”
“Yes, we can be close friends, but I’m now committed to a relationship with Ginny. I think you would like her Jennifer and if we are ever in the same place, I want to introduce her to you. I think you would like her too. I’ve never told her about you or discussed what happened at Jill’s house with her. So she will see the true Jennifer if you ever decide to talk with her.”
“I would like to meet your new squeeze Billy. You have good taste, you chose me you know. ” She giggled. I said, “I’m delighted to hear your giggle. I want you to be happy Jennifer.”
“Thanks Billy. That means a lot.” I want to kiss you Billy. Please let me kiss you for being a faithful friend.”
She didn’t wait for permission; she put her arms around my neck pressing her chest against mine, and kissed me passionately on my lips. She didn’t insert her tongue inside my mouth, but our lips were parted and wet with our saliva. She leaned back, her beautiful eyes were clear, a smile emerging from deep inside of her heart. She put her arms around my waist and told me how much that kiss meant to her. She leaned her head on my chest and I could feel her beating heart. She didn’t say anything to me. She just held me close and I could hear a soft pleasing cooing sound emerging from within her soul. I stayed with her. I rubbed her gently, feeling her breasts against my chest. It brought old feelings to the surface and I couldn’t discard them. My senses were being aroused, I had little defense to block the feelings being generated in my brain. I could barely hear Mrs. Wilson’s warning to be careful.
My mind was telling me, “Seize the moment stupid. She wants you to make love to her. If you really love her why don’t you satisfy her desires. What the fuck are you going to do Billy? You made a commitment to Ginny just last night! Don’t you remember that? Mrs. Wilson wants you to be careful because she wants you for herself. Why else would she deliberately show you her fethiye escort bayan private areas. She wants you for herself. You like her, in fact you think she would be easy to seduce since her husband can’t provide her with any satisfaction. Besides he is dumpy looking. She wants a young man who enjoys sex and you’re the man she wants to satisfy her longings. What are you going to do Billy? Who do you really want to be with? Your dad will return in a year and your mom won’t be able to sleep with you anymore. Mrs. Wilson is not going to jeopardize her teaching credential or her marriage for a unpredictable teenage boy who is hot to fuck anything with a skirt on and boobs to play with. So what are you going to do? It seems to me Jennifer is the only one that has a chance for a long range romance. She’s ready right now Billy. You may not have another opportunity, you better grab it now or lose it forever.”
I could feel my penis enlarging as we embraced one another. Neither of us said anything. Was Jennifer’s brain racing like mine? Did she want me to fuck her or was she just pleased that I had forgiven her and was content to be friends only?
I heard a moaning sound and she began to press her body into my hardening penis. I knew she wanted me to press back toward her. My mind said again, “Seize the moment Billy; don’t be stupid. She wants your dick deep inside of her. Just do it!”
I pushed my lower body into her and she moaned audibly. “Oh, Billy, I love how you are holding me. I love you so much.”
My penis was now hard and I knew Jennifer could feel it pressing hard against her body.
She said, “Billy, I like what I am feeling. Do you want to go somewhere where we will be more comfortable?”
I whispered in her ear, :Yes!”
She looked up at me. She smiled. She took my hand and began to lead me toward her bedroom and I stopped. She turned around and faced me. “What’s wrong Billy?”
“Jennifer, I can’t do this yet? My body says yes, but my mind says you can’t do this to Ginny. I would be doing the same thing you did at Jill’s if I have sex with you right now.” I need to think about this. I don’t want to hurt Ginny and I don’t want you to have unrealistic expectations. I love you Jennifer, but I love Ginny too. I just can’t do this to her or to you.”
“I understand Billy. You’re right! But if you change your mind please tell me. I want you Billy. I want you without attachments and if you want me I will never disappoint you again. She hugged me and said, “You better get home or your mom is going to get angry. She’s going to think you had sex with me.”
I left her house and my detractor in my brain said, “She wanted you to fuck her and you said “‘no.’ That’s the most stupid thing you’ve ever done. Well, now you’re going to have to explain to Ginny why you stayed so long talking with Jennifer. She’s not going to believe you when you tell her you didn’t have sex. You’re in a no win situation, and you didn’t even get to fuck her pussy.”
I walked as fast as I could and when I walked through the door Ginny said, “What took you so long? You’ve been out of school for over two hours? Did Jennifer read you her biography?”
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